Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
如果说2021学到了什么的话，就是没人从2020年学到什么。披着黑色幽默的外衣，看似是新闻联播脱口秀，内里又好像真实的回顾了一次美国视角的全球2021。“疫苗让大家尽可能回归正常的生活”真的不是疫苗宣传片吗。
2021 只是又一个人类不断重复错误的年份。
笑死了，希望能成为每年的定番！Average British citizen是最好笑的哈哈哈哈哈.
多讽刺
挺适合节日看的。两位演技都很好，导演会选。徐贤还挺能hold得住心动表情的，狠劲虽然不足但适合角色；好像是李濬容的第一部电影？角色诠释得很有趣，性感的地方也能拿得住。镜头语言很喜欢，有几处空镜很有巧思，色彩碰撞也很大胆，能记住不少特别的镜头。职场上下级、女性困境和性喜好不该被凝视都有很好的表达。不太理解的地方是1.接到求救电话明显知道不对应该收声赶紧到现场啊，而且按照此常理行动也能接得住后面的情节吧？2.最后两段告白略有点硬。最后就是预告更好看一点。最最后，这部分级是tv-14想看某些情节的请先了解下
加长版b站年度盘点，应该把伪纪录片的伪字去掉，这就是现实啊！法国要加入AUKUS那一段我真的笑到疯癫。
哇哈哈哈哈！
相当于吐槽版的年终复盘，段子写得很好，比别抬头更惹笑。简简单单，若非网飞是个流媒体平台，则没必要做成视频。
演员阵容没有去年那么强，但没想到Joy会进去，戏份还不少。他倒是很适合这种无脑网红博主的角色，只是发型不适合，显得整个人胖了好几圈。
2021持续糟心，题材上很安全地迎合了主流的政治正确，便没有反讽的内核了。话说回来，每一年的烦心事都这么多，因为这些事就给自己偷懒找借口，可就白活一年了。2022加油！
这玩意儿能有续集，本身就很魔幻了，魔幻的不是这玩意儿，是这个世界。
噱头的电影，羞耻度倒是有，大尺度谈不上，徐贤真的显老，男主长得不错，鼻子优越！很“狗”
3、居然在显示的地图搞小动作，台湾和大陆的颜色不一样
和去年的一样还是很好笑的。不过还是希望2022没有素材来拍这个了。
没有新意 再看第二次就会有点厌倦 这一次的讽刺力度也小了一些
今年的没啥意思，有诉求了，有意图了，好像就失去了活力。大多是隔靴搔痒，只在“他化苦难与悲痛为金钱的能力比Adele还厉害”那里笑了一下😅
对民主党和共和党的讽刺力度完全不同，只能说就是好莱坞左派带着屁股拍的~
暗讽2021荒诞的黑色political和主义幽默对着现实犹如隔靴搔痒。没关系，等这两年过了以后就知道这两年有多好了。Death to 2021, death to everything Yeah. :)
有些地方还挺好笑，气候大会处不忘记黑中印，工业化的末班车，印度也不知道有机会赶上不
时代本身的荒诞让所有吐槽都显得无力，悲痛与愤怒都仅余一丝冷笑。
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